Psychotherapy and counselling

Therapy, psychotherapy and counselling are all words for the same process. The following questions and answers are designed to help you find out some more about therapy, and give you some insight into how I view the process. If you have questions of your own, I’d be happy to answer them.

What happens during therapy?

The process is different for every person. By sharing and exploring emotional difficulties and pressures, a new way of understanding and tackling them can be found. I believe the client is the best expert in their own life, and I will always trust in your ability to grow and change, even when you find it hardest. With a therapist, it can become possible to try new ways of thinking or feeling until you are able to move again through the difficult moments of life. It is my privilege to share in those moments, difficult and joyous, with my clients.

What kind of therapy do you offer?

I am a Person-Centred psychotherapist. This means that I work with whatever the client brings, in an environment of non-judgemental empathy, holding the relationship as central to our work. I believe that the key components to effective therapy are the client’s belief in their capacity to change, and the successful relationship between client and therapist. Although I am not the expert in you and your life decisions – that is your privilege – my expertise in managing the relationship between us means I work to ensure that the needs of the client are met.

What clients do you work with?

I work with adult clients, and older teenagers (14+). I also work with couples and intimate partners. I can offer a range of short, medium or long term therapy; anything from 2-3 sessions to over a year. How long we work together may depend on many factors, including what you can afford right now. The speed at which we move is chosen by you, and we will explore regularly how the relationship is working. We don’t end therapy without both agreeing it is the right time. I am keen to work with those who need to enter into therapy as part of their own training to be a psychotherapist or counsellor. For more information on my work with young people, please see the relevant section on my website.

What is a ‘typical’ client like?

Of course, there isn’t one. However, there are often combinations of the following experiences:

  • sadness, grief or anxiety

  • a feeling of stuckness

  • a desire for change or growth

  • confused priorities or responsibilities

  • fear of failure or rejection

  • feeling like you’re ‘not enough’

  • frustrations at an inability to solve everything immediately

  • negative thoughts about self

What does a ‘typical’ client get from therapy?

Again, there isn’t a typical or normal outcome. Therapy takes different paths, and clients are often surprised by the direction of the outcome. However, these are familiar experiences:

  • seeing yourself as worthy, good enough

  • knowing how to practice self-care

  • achieving changes and shifts

  • starting to grow and blossom

  • renewed pride in achievements

  • acknowledging their capacity

  • learning your triggers and managing daily living

  • owning a sense of self; unique and loved

What issues do you work with?

I have worked with a wide range of issues, and don’t select clients on the basis of their presenting issue. For me, how the issue has an impact on the life of the client is more central than what the actual issue is. I have had success in working with clients to manage mental health issues such as anxiety, depression, OCD and bipolar disorder. I have worked with issues ranging from complex grief, body and gender dysmorphia, transgender transition, relationship problems at home and work through to trauma and historic abuse.

What do I have to do?

I won’t set you any homework, give you advice or push you into uncomfortable places. I will ask you to be in an honest and reflective relationship with me as your therapist. You need to consider that life may start to feel different, and that you may feel differently about life. Although you may be looking for a change or a relief, that process can still be challenging. Having experienced therapy, I know the ups and downs of the process from both sides, and I also know that each client faces it in their own way.

How can I look after myself while I’m having therapy?

Self-care is a vital part of the therapeutic journey. Therapy is demanding, and the emotional labour needs to be accounted for when you consider your needs for rest and relaxation. What self-care looks like for you is something I will ask you to explore and investigate. It isn’t about simple ‘me time’, pampering or naps (although those are all useful), it is about finding ways to still yourself and your mind, to achieve a change in perspective and rediscover the reality and your capacity to grow. My own self-care is at the heart of my work and identity – creating the kusudama is a vital aspect of my self-care routine.

The Zoom area in my Loughborough office